Joy Clarke Therapy


Anger, a friend in need

Anger, a friend? It’s worth thinking more about anger. What comes to mind now is Sue Monk Kidd in Dance of the Dissident Daughter saying that we think of only 2 things to do with anger we feel: one is to bottle it in to keep the peace, the other is to express anger and hurt people – both are destructive. She talks of the 3rd way – to use anger to begin a process of change.

Remember this?

April, come she will When streams are ripe and swelled with rain May, she will stay Resting in my arms again June, she’ll change her tune In restless walks, she’ll prowl the night July, she will fly And give no warning of her flight August, die she must The autumn winds blow chilly and cold September, I’ll remember A love once new has now grown old © 1965 Words and Music by Paul Simon Do you ever get bothered that most of what we read or sing or hear about autumn, the terms are from the Northern hemisphere? I

Imago Mills & Mokoena Style

The purpose of a housekeeper, I think, is only overtly to keep the house. The real purpose is for her to keep me.  Alinah knows how to make all the different kinds of tea I like, and she knows when I’m tired. She’s the person who sees when I’ve worked through the day without pause. She opens the gate and gets the kettle boiling for each of my clients, and keeps a jug of water with fresh mint in the fridge. She listens while she irons, to my thoughts and plans and stories about my children. She tells me her

Loving you and me

We take responsibility for our own needs. We talk about what we need from each other, clearly and directly. We take great and tender care of our own feelings. We treat each other’s feelings with love and respect and confidence. We share responsibility both for respectful space, and fun, warm closeness. We speak our own truths, and only our truth. We have fun together! We enjoy and love each other, with delight and in God.    

Many selves of sexuality

Mark and Stacey, an attractive couple in their early thirties, have only been married two years and they’re already knotted in conflict. In our first session, Mark, an intense, athletically built man, gets to the point, “I hate it that we’re such a stereotype, but it’s the typical scenario of me wanting more sex than she does. We’re down to once every two weeks–if I’m lucky–and it’s driving me crazy. I have a strong sex drive, so if it were up to me, we’d do it every day, the way we used to when we were dating. Now, not only